Quotations
Funny
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
- Jarod Kintz
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
- Mark Twain
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
- Winston S. Churchill
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
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