Quotations
Funny
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
- George Bernard Shaw
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
- Wilson Mizner
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
- George Eliot
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
- Frank Sinatra
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
- Ronald Reagan
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
- Winston S. Churchill
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