Quotations
Funny
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
- George Eliot
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
- Mark Twain
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
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