Quotations
Funny
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
- Winston S. Churchill
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
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